Hear me roar

I received Robert Master's September Newsletter - the Crucible of Awakening - in my inbox this morning. The essay this month was on Feminine Anger, so I checked it out for his insights on this very powerful matter.

Clear female anger is fierce heart-compassion beckoning her beau (or whomever the anger is directed to) to wake up. I've felt this. I've voiced this. I've roared to my boy. (And, I'm not sure he really got it even then.)

But, it amazes me that it takes that much of a reaction for the female voice to be heard by her male counterpart / consort at times. I mean, really - this rage takes energy. Sometimes it feels like I need to harness my inner-bitch (who is much closer to the surface at certain times of the month) and risk being called such trite labels as 'overactive', 'nag' and 'fun-ruiner' by an unreceptive audience. The ninja-force of a clear-cutting goddess roar should never be missed or leave you unmoved - unless you wanna get booted to the curb or drop kicked into the next universe.

Robert Masters eloquently writes:

"Anger is culturally held as far less legitimate an expression for women than for men. The result is that for many women anger is unavailable as a resource. And a woman marooned from her own anger is very likely going to have a much harder time maintaining healthy boundaries; she will tend to feel more helpless, more fearful, more prone to despair and depression.

"When her anger cannot be depressed — kept or pressed down — its energies may be routed into resentment or bitterness. And what a pity this is, given that anger can be, whatever its degree of fieriness, a form of caring. In my work I have often seen a woman’s anger — full-out clean rage, free of sarcasm, blaming, and shaming — cut through the cognitive muddling and emotional dissociation of her partner or others, waking them up to what they’re actually doing.

[...]
"Yet a woman expressing non-abusive rage is no murderess, psycho, or Medusa gone into isolation, but rather a potent awakener, the power of which is present to varying degrees in “everyday” women whose anger is significantly infused with caring. Wrathful compassion. Anger and love are not necessarily mutually exclusive. Anger can be full-blooded, fierce,and fiery, and still be rooted in compassion. Heart-anger.

"Just because many men fear openly expressed female anger — retreating like frantic sperm from the suddenly engulfing power of the ovum— is not reason enough to slander or suppress it. A woman who is out of touch with her anger is a woman who cannot stand her ground or give full voice to her needs, a woman who cannot sufficiently protect the little girl in her, a woman whose love lacks the guts needed to manifest real integrity."